We must reinvent love
by ohmypreciousgirl
Summary: "Is it a side effect of the head injury you talked about?" Oliver looked at the doctor, ignoring completely Felicity's confusion. She felt the rage rushing through her in response to Oliver's disregard. "Mr. Queen, I told you that your wife could…" "I'm not his wife," Felicity interrupted the woman, using her loud voice.
1. Prologue

Felicity woke up feeling wretched. She kept her eyes shut, not wanting to face reality as her head was pounding, and her mouth tasted like something had died in it.

It was the feeling of a hand wrapped around hers that finally made her open her eyes.

Everything was blurry at first, but as she blinked her surroundings came into focus. From the look of white walls and the sound of a monitor beeping, it was clear she was in a hospital. She narrowed her eyes, confused by her location.

_What happened?_ She thought as she forced herself to remember why she would be lying on a hospital bed. However, nothing came to her mind.

She turned her head, her eyes moving from the hand holding hers up a long, muscular arm to… Oliver. She was surprised to find Oliver sitting beside her bed, his eyes were closed and his beard was a lot longer than she was used to seeing. She couldn't get to see clear enough as she was without her glasses.

"Oliver," she called to him with a hoarse voice.

In matter of seconds Oliver was out of his chair and hovering over her bed.

"Felicity," he said as one of his hands was immediately on her shoulder. He was so close to her that she could finally make out of his face. Somehow, he looked older and there were dark circles around his eyes. Clearly, he spent a lot of time beside her bed if his disheveled state was anything to go by. It didn't help the fact she couldn't remember what happened. She wasn't a doctor, but it was a clear sign of the situation's gravity.

"Why am I in a hospital?" she asked, moving her head slightly to lock her eyes with his. He gave her a short smile before he touched her cheekbone with the back of his left hand.

"You were in a car accident," he explained softly, looking at her with so much concern that it made her heart ache. "I don't know exactly what happened. They just found you and then they called me."

She nodded, but stopped immediately when a sharp pain shot through her temple. She must have winced because Oliver stopped touching her face and started moving away from her.

"I'll call the doctor," he told her as he walked out of the room in a hurry.

She closed her eyes and focused in breathing in and out slowly. It was hard to concentrate when she could hear Oliver calling out loudly for Dr. Tyler. From his tone of voice, Felicity knew whoever Dr. Tyler was they'd be at the receiving end of Oliver's glare.

A few moments later, Oliver entered the room accompanied by a short blonde woman carrying a clipboard with her. Felicity was relieved to notice the doctor didn't seem to be annoyed or bothered by Oliver's intense glare.

The doctor stood at the end of her bed while Oliver went back to her side. She sent Oliver a warning look as a way to tell him to stop glaring at the doctor, but he remained impassive. Felicity sighed in exasperation before looking at the doctor.

"I'm glad you finally woke up, Mrs. Queen," she said with a kind smile. "How are you feeling?"

Felicity blinked at the woman, perplexed by the surname she used. Felicity opened her mouth as she shook her head with widened eyes.

"I'm sorry; did you just call me Mrs. Queen?" Felicity inquired as she looked at Oliver with confusion.

Oliver frowned, crossing his arms. "Of course she called you Mrs. Queen. It's your surname."

Felicity stared at him, trying to conciliate the fact that Oliver was actually confirming the nonsense that doctor just spoke.

"I'm sorry what?" she asked in disbelief.

_Is it really happening to me?_ Felicity questioned herself.

"Is it a side effect of the head injury you talked about?" Oliver looked at the doctor, ignoring completely Felicity's confusion. She felt the rage rushing through her in response to Oliver's disregard.

"Mr. Queen, I told you that your wife could…"

"I'm not his wife," she interrupted the woman, using her loud voice.

Her outburst seemed to capture Oliver and Dr. Tyler's attention as they both looked at her. The woman looked impassive as Oliver looked concerned and a bit hurt.

Her heart skipped a few beats just for the way Oliver was looking at her. She knew him long enough to understand what he felt. He was actually serious about her being his wife.

She swallowed down the lump that formed in her throat. It couldn't be true, but somehow it was.

She lost her memories and she was married to Oliver.

For a moment, Felicity thought she was panicking, but the feeling of Oliver's hand closing around hers grounded her feelings.

"You really don't remember being married to me, do you?" Oliver asked in resignation.

"I don't," she told him in a weak voice, trying to pace her breath.

Oliver closed his eyes for a moment as he tightened the grip on her hand, signs of his distress. In the short time she spent with him in the hospital room it was obvious to her she meant the world to him. She didn't remember him ever looking at her with such intensity before. She was surprised to actually see how affected he truly was because of her lack of memories instead of him hiding his emotions as it seemed to be his default setting.

Not anymore, apparently.

"Is she going to be okay?" he asked, snapping Felicity out of her reverie.

"Yes, eventually," the doctor said before looking at Felicity. "Mrs. Queen, the only serious injury you took from the accident was the head injury. Your amnesia is a side effect that will probably end when your brain heals completely. I'll request for you to take a few exams, so we can be sure about your condition, now if you'll excuse me," the blonde said before heading out of the room, leaving Oliver and Felicity alone.

"I'm sorry, Oliver," she muttered.

"Hey," he said as his hand once again tightened around hers. "It's not your fault."

She looked at him and she could remember the last time she saw him: she had helped him put the mask Barry gave to him for the first time.

"The last time I saw you, you let me put on you the mask Barry gave to you," she told him.

Oliver took a deep breath, before opening his mouth.

"Four years," he said, looking at their hands locked together. "It was four years ago, give or take some time."

"Everything is going to be fine, alright?" He spoke as he looked into her eyes, giving her a reassuring smile. Felicity frowned at his unusually optimistic words, before nodding.

_Well, unusual for someone who is missing four years of memories, _she reflected as _s_he tried to mimic his smile.

He surprised her by leaning down to drop a kiss on her forehead. She gasped softly at his delicate gesture. She felt the rush of blood on her face as it usually happened whenever Oliver got really close to her.

"I'll be right back," he whispered as he leaned backward, watching her for a few seconds.

"I'll wait for you," she promised.

Oliver gave her one last smile before walking out of the room.

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**Notes:** Title from 'Mad as Rabbits' by Panic! At The Disco. Special thanks to dedication2em, everythingisbloomable, gretaprewett and tanya-posts. Please, comment if you liked it :)


	2. Chapter 01

**Notes: **Special thanks to chasethewind and allstartstofade for their suggestions and endless help. Also LoudVoice and dedication2em for brainstorming this fic with me! All of you made this fic a possible!

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It took two weeks for the doctors to finally release her from the hospital.

Her time there was a bit fuzzy, especially the first few days. She remembered taking exams and, as requested by Oliver, a specialist in head injuries came to see her to give him a second opinion. Apparently, he gave Oliver the same answer Dr. Tyler offered: only time would solve her amnesia, if she ever recovered from it at all. As with any type of neurological injury, unpredictability was a main factor. There was no way to tell if she'd remember or not, they could only deal with the immediate future.

And the immediate future meant her recovery at the hospital. According to her doctor, the process started the second she woke up, although she was concerned that she couldn't recall waking up. That was when she learned during the recovery, she might experience difficulty remembering things, especially in the first few days.

The first memory she had was Oliver sitting on the edge of her bed, holding her hand and explaining to her what happened. She remembered his soft voice telling her to not be scared, promising her that they'd go through it together and she'd be fine in the end. And then, in the gentlest way that he could've broken to her the news about their relationship, Oliver told her they were married. She had never been more shocked in her whole life. And then, his hand cupped her face, his thumb stroking her skin softly while he reassured her that they didn't need to talk about it right that moment. He told her to focus on getting out of the hospital first, everything else would come later.

After that, they didn't mention their marriage again, even though she couldn't stop replaying his words inside her head over and over again.

'You and I, we are married.'

Those words followed her thoughts day and night. And when she thought it was out of mind, there was a nurse or Dr. Tyler to remind her that she was Mrs. Queen. If it wasn't the hospital staff, it was the wedding band ornamenting Oliver's ring-finger. The new aspect of her life was constantly hovering over her mind, although she wasn't ready to deal with that yet. Oliver said they'd discuss it after she got out of the hospital and he was right. There was a time and a place for that particular conversation and it shouldn't happen there.

Regardless of avoiding difficult topics like their marriage, it didn't mean that she was ignoring Oliver. They spent a lot of time together, as Oliver only went home to sleep. It was blatantly obvious to her that their relationship was different, just by the way he interacted with her. It took her a couple of days to master her reaction to Oliver's display of affection, especially when he took her by surprise. It was hard to keep track of her thoughts when he held her hand and traced invisible patterns on her skin or to not blush when he kissed her cheek or forehead. She remembered turning red when he did it for the first time, feeling grateful he didn't seem to notice it.

Still, it felt nice to be around him without adding work to the equation. Sure, they were friends, but they didn't hang out for the sake of hanging out. There was always a next target to take care of, a serious conversation to be had, and a plan to be put together. It was rare for them to stop and just be. Not that she thought they were hanging out and having fun because she had eyes and she noticed Oliver's tense posture and awkward moves as he felt lost. In those moments, she'd reach out and hold his hand because she got that feeling too.

She felt at a loss because it was like she had gone to sleep and then woke up in a world where she was Oliver Queen's wife. How does someone even react to that? The prospect of being married to Oliver sounded absurd to her ears, and for that to be her reality was ridiculous. Yes, she had this innocent crush on Oliver because he was the most gorgeous man she had ever seen in her life, but she only saw him as a friend. It didn't matter what other people thought when they saw them together, she always believed they were wrong. She never looked at Oliver and thought about the possibility of them becoming a couple, much less a married one. The fact she now carried his surname showed that what everyone had detected had indeed been always there. She didn't know what to make out of it, to be quite honest.

Meanwhile, Oliver had to deal with an amnesiac wife. She had no idea how he must be feeling, but it couldn't be any better than how she felt. Just the idea of Oliver forgetting about her made her shudder in dread. Living said experience had to be a nightmare, especially for a spouse. She tried to not think the implications of said commitment, but it was excruciating.

Oliver was married to her. Willingly.

How that did even happen?

Seriously, that was definitely the first question she'd ask Oliver the minute they sat down to talk.

So, after the shock of learning that she had amnesia wore off, she started receiving visitors aside from Oliver and Diggle. To her surprise, Roy, Sara, Barry, Thea, Detective Lance and Lyla quickly became constant presences at the hospital.

She was content to learn that Roy knew about Oliver and was part of the team, just like Sara, who now lived a somewhat regular life that she balanced with fighting crime. From what little she understood, Barry helped them occasionally, although it wasn't quite clear to her as to how. Thea and Lyla weren't in the know about Arrow business, but they treated her as a dear friend and she was glad that she managed to be friends with other people outside her night job. Detective Lance visited every night after his shift to see how she was doing and they talked a bit, he filled her in about the new case he was working. Even Mr. Steele dropped by once to see her. As always, her mother was absent. She only sent a get well card with a huge fruit basket as an apology for not being able to leave her company in Coast City, but nothing new there. The thing that took her genuinely by surprise was the flowers Laurel sent to her.

All in all, the days she spent at the hospital felt like living inside a bubble, ignoring the ramifications of her problem to her professional and personal life. It seemed like her friends and family had a silent agreement to not bring up important topics. Everyone just kept her company, distracting her with movies, TV shows and general gossip. She understood they were giving her time to process her condition and get better, and for that she was grateful. As she recovered, Felicity's state of confusion and disorientation faded. Dr. Tyler took that as improvement of her case, an indication that she was well enough to be discharged, despite the fact she needed to receive further treatment at the hospital since her memories didn't come back yet.

To Felicity, that meant she was ready to face her difficult situation. The first step was going home with Oliver.

Although, home didn't mean the small apartment near QC, decorated with furniture bought at IKEA and walls she painted after she signed the lease. Now, it meant a double level penthouse apartment located in the heart of Starling City, accessed only by a private elevator.

She was surprised to find that, despite the luxury, it was evident that she was the one who personally picked everything for the place. The decor and the furniture were exactly the type she always wanted to acquire, but with her EA salary, couldn't ever afford. From the lack of bright colors in the living room where she was standing now, it was obvious she took Oliver's taste in consideration too. In comparison to her mismatched colorful small apartment, her new home was color-coordinated and a bit plain, but still looked comfortable to live in from the little she saw.

Now, she stood inside the closet she shared with Oliver, going through the drawers from the side that seemed to belong to her as it was crammed with her clothes. She checked the first drawer, finding it filled with sets of underwear. The second one held her pajamas and several old buttons-up shirts that evidently used to belong to Oliver. In the third one, she found what she was looking for: different pairs of yoga pants and tank tops. She chose a piece of each and went straight to the bathroom to change.

After Oliver showed her around the apartment, he had led her to their suite and told her to get into comfortable clothes while he went downstairs to put something together for them to eat. If she thought downstairs was huge, upstairs was just as bad. They didn't have only their suite, but two rooms that served as office and gym, plus a balcony. The view from it took her breath away, making her immediately understand why she'd agreed to live in a place that must have cost Oliver a small fortune.

As she closed the bedroom door behind her, Felicity walked down the stairs, following the sizzle of pans and the sound of kitchen utensils clinking.

The kitchen wasn't as large as she thought it'd be. It was decorated in shades of brown, with wooden cabinets, a black marble countertop and all of the kitchen equipment a house should have.

She smiled at the sight she never imagined witnessing: Oliver in front of a stove, with his sleeves rolled up, stirring spaghetti sauce. His eyes averted from the stove to find hers, his mouth quirked up in a smile.

"Hey," he greeted her. "Why don't you sit down while I finish here?" he requested, pointing at the two chairs close to the countertop. Felicity nodded, pulling one of the chairs to sit down. She spent the following minutes just quietly watching Oliver, who was absorbed in his task. She was surprised by his fluidity around the kitchen. She guessed he used to do it a lot for the two of them, since she knew no one should ever trust her in a kitchen. He pulled their plates and flatware out of one of the cabinets, serving the food before walking towards her.

"It smells good," she commented when Oliver put her plate of pasta in front of her. He smiled softy, dropping a kiss to her temple before sliding to the chair besides her. She felt the familiar heartwarming sensation envelop her as she sent him a grateful smile.

"It's your favorite," he told her.

"Thank you," she said before start eating it. She moaned softly around her fork. "Seriously, is there anything you're bad at?" she countered a bit annoyed, taking another bite of her food.

"Computers," he winked at her before digging into his plate.

She chuckled, shaking her head at him. Even though occasionally their situation was awkward, their time together made Felicity feel at ease instead of pressured. Their situation could be described as complicated at best, but the contentment Oliver's presence provided reassured her that whatever they built in the past could be salvaged in her present.

It was a good feeling.

She was almost finished with her pasta when Oliver broke the companionable silence.

"Felicity?"

"Yeah?" she said, looking at him.

"I think we should talk tonight," he informed her with his determined face.

She sighed, biting her lip.

"I know," she nodded. "Let's finish here and then we can talk."

The tender smile tugging on the corners of Oliver's lips made her pulse quicken.

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**A.N.:** Thanks everyone who commented and favorited this fic! You give me motivation to keep writing :D So never stop doing what you do! You're awesome, people!

If you already favorited, always let me know how you felt about the new chapter!

For the people who sent me messages as guests: Guests, pia, tianna and Amaclucky13, I hope you guys enjoy this and the new chapter is as good as the first first one :)

Naty


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